Thursday, August 13, 2009


This week's readwritepoem prompt asked us to "choose a vowel sound and exploit it" in our poems. I chose two sounds: ooooo as in "shoe" or "pool" and aaaaayyy as in "wave" or "say."

The pool labors mightily
To stay smooth, restrain waves,
Retain her dignity.

When you go to part her surface
With a blade
She doesn’t move.

Try as you may there is
No ruffling
her liquid feathers.

Are you dismayed
by such an enraging
lack of ripples?
By her never-changing mood?

Does it vex you?
Bid you stay?
Have you fooled?

You can rage
and never roil her,
probe her depths,
reach her floor.

You won't move her.

She has too much to prove
to lose herself as foam
upon your solid shore.


  1. WOW! I was ooooing and swaying right there.
    You might like this post:

  2. Kathleen, thank you! I was not feeling great about this poem when I posted it, so I am glad you liked it. And thanks for the link. It is a powerful post. I plan on visiting that blog again.

  3. I think it works; and you capture the essence of the trapped water of the pool beautifully.

  4. you should feel good about this poem my pâintings I dont know if i like ANY of mine..dont ever finish them...just abandom them...good...bad..whatever expressions come out

  5. Wow! what a great image--I see her as this immutable presence--solid, still, unimpressed by frothy antics--love it!!! I was thinking about writing to this prompt, but couldn't figure out which vowel sound I wanted to go with *sigh* I should just do it already, right?

  6. I was really moved by this piece. To me, (is it just me) the pool of water is a metaphor for someone who is so self-possessed and calm there is no way to anger them...

  7. Cynthia-I kind of pictured someone like that, who is impossible to ruffle because she is so self-possessed, OR someone who works so hard at being self-possessed and calm because she doesn't ever want to be vulnerable.

    Guatami--Thank you!

    Tina-pick a vowel and go!

    ds and Wayne-thanks for the support. I think I need to let my poems go like you do with your paintings, Wayne.

    Annie-you are so sweet.

  8. I don't often read poetry out loud here at the computer, but I read this one and it really works that way! Cooooool and perfect photo to go with it.

  9. Lydia- When I was in college, I had a professor of mine who said my poetry worked better when read silently--not out loud! So you have given me a BIG compliment.

  10. You sustain the metaphor wonderfully -- and such beautiful use of sound!

  11. Hi Erin,

    I'm rather late here but I loved it. Your poems seem so effortless but I'm sure that's not the case! I love the way you hold on to rhyme. I like this very much.